For a couple months prior to our Mexico trip, I had been struggling with uncertainties in life. I did not know if I wanted to continue going to school full time or work part time while I studied. When I was asked if I wanted to go to Mexico, I was torn. I did want to go but there were also factors holding me back. Registration for school was the week after the Mexico trip. I also did not know if I should go because I would have to take time off from work and it may not have been financially responsible of me to go. After struggling and praying about this the Spirit placed in my heart a yearning to go. 

When we got to Mexico, our contact, Pastor Kyle, told us many of the churches that had visited him over the past couple weeks prepared VBS programs for the children, so he wanted us to help him during the week rather than doing the activities we had planned. When I heard this I felt like all that we prepared for were a waste and we did not know what exactly we would be doing for the next week. That first night, I became restless not knowing what we would be doing during the trip and was not able to get much sleep. I assumed that things were not planned out and the next week might turn out to be a waste of time. 

That next day was a Sunday and after church we went to the house of a child that Pastor Kyle planned to build a new house for and they were living in was a small shack made of straw that would leak in the rain. Pastor Kyle explained to us how his heart went out to the people in Mexico and how it felt like it was his calling to share God’s love with them. After, he thanked us for coming to see and pray for the land and family and that the donations we have prepared was going to go into finish building the house for this family. After hearing this, I was reminded of just how broken and selfish I am. I was worried about how things were not planned and the time we were going to spend might be a waste, but Pastor Kyle wanted us to see how God was working in his life. At that moment, I was reminded of Isaiah 6 when God asked “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” and Pastor Kyle was imitating Isaiah’s response, “Here I am! Send me,” by living in Mexico and doing his best to share His love with these people in Mexico.

During devotions the next morning, Pastor Kyle went over Matthew 6 asking if there were things in our lives that hindered us from fully giving ourselves to follow Christ. As Pastor Kyle was going over this, I knew that God was directly speaking to me. I have been struggling with the uncertainties of my future and I was letting it hinder my my relationship with God. At the end of Matthew 6, Jesus reminds us that even the birds are fed, and states “Are you not of more value than they?” After listening to Pastor Kyle and meditating during the devotionals I was more at peace with the anxiety and restlessness. Throughout the trip I was more at peace and found myself leaning on God as we followed and observed Pastor Kyle’s life in Mexico. 

“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” –Matthew 6:34